Men want to make their partners happy. If they can’t make them happy, they feel like failures. If your man feels as if he can’t win in the end by making you happy, he will withdraw. Give your man the opportunity to be your hero.

Do NOTs:

1) Do not tell him to “be a man” or “man up.” He gets it already. Even if you’re thinking it, don’t verbalize it.  What’s your point, to hurt him?

2) Do not fuss at him in public. Don’t belittle your man by calling him out in front of others. Teasing him and rolling your eyes isn’t going to get a positive response.

3) Do not disregard his feelings. It’s true, men think differently and may not be as expressive, but they, too, have emotions.

4) Do not ask him to do something for you, and then do it yourself. Either do it yourself or don’t ask; but if you do ask, give him the full opportunity to step-up in his own way.

5) Do not degrade his career. Today, women are super smart and super successful.  You take a man as you find him, and support him in achieving his goals. Don’t go into a relationship looking to “change” him or his career.

6) Do not micro-manage his duties. He’s an adult, just like you. Don’t treat him as if you’re his mother, or it will depolarize the relationship.

7) Do not ask an outside man to “get it done.” Men are territorial, and your man has claimed you. If outside help is needed, give him the opportunity to problem-solve and bring someone else in if necessary.

8) Do not make him carry your purse. He’s not a woman, and you don’t want him to be.

9) Do not always need to outdo your man. You’re in it to win it with him; you needn’t win every race, game, or argument. To beat him may not always be a win.

10) Do not compare him to other men. You don’t want to make your man feel inadequate. All people respond better to reinforcement that is positive, rather than negative.

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